If you’ve ever taken an Italian course or looked into Italian film or literature, you will most likely first be introduced to a movement called “Verismo,” which loosely translates to “truth.” It was characterized by realistic depictions of everyday life, usually described as “banal” or “naturalistic.” Later, parts of this ideology would be picked apart and applied to Neorealism to form the Golden Age of Italian cinema, in which directors chose actors that had no training and had often lived through the very tragedies they acted in. The result of years of oppression and war and poverty and desolation, these works were less banal in production than their historic counterparts. They were meant to cause pain in the viewer, because the whole country had been in misery for quite some time.
A few years ago on here, I wrote a post about something banal, like shit men do to that fails to impress women. I deleted it after receiving messages that I was “too good” for writing like that: click-bait and Cosmo-like articles were somehow beneath me. So I stopped. I went straight back to writing about heartache or loss or really sad stuff because that’s how I felt better and I had been chastised into believing that I could not do otherwise. I was studying neorealism without noticing that I was using its same techniques: an everyday girl writing about her life and her everyday struggles in order to cleanse or heal.
Now, I’m happy most of the time. My struggles with life revolve around career and futures that I’d ideally like to have wrapped up in neat little boxes and delivered at my doorstep (or, the doorstep of my new apartment far away from Zeeland where I live on my own in luxury). Some of my best writing came from heartache, which I can say without feeling egotistical because they are all pieces that mean a lot to me, despite what any reader may think.
I just don’t think I can sustain that kind of sadness anymore–and that’s a good thing! Instead of being consumed with thoughts of love and loss and the tumultuous emotional roller coaster that is college, I am looking at life with new interest in even the most mundane of tasks. I love yoga and baking and taking pictures of pretty things and thrift store shopping for furniture I can restore and nail polish and SO MUCH that would fall underneath the category of “beneath me” should I let it still apply. So I’m not. I’m letting go of what this space used to mean, because it is MEANT to evolve with me.
So now comes to transition. A blog once about life, love and loss and change will now be about all of those things, but with enough lightheartedness mixed in to maintain ALL of my interests, not just the overly-passionate ones. If you head over to instagram, you can see that I’ve already gotten started (much to the annoyance of some, I’m sure). If you comment on your thoughts or with suggestions on what you want to see more of, I’ll take them into account when planning the next years of WeStayAwake (just go to WeStayAwake through your tumblr blog or on my wordpress site at the bottom of the post). Maybe together we can make the ordinary into something more than banality. Italy moved on to the fantastical and baroque stylings of Federico Fellini– if you’ve ever seen “La Dolce Vita” then you have witnessed the reversal and rejection of neorealism in action: more glitter, less darkness. That is what we can do together here: more glitter, less darkness. More glitter, less darkness.